Adam Lambert felt “ashamed” of who he was when photos of him kissing a man leaked online.

Adam Lambert, known for his powerhouse vocals and magnetic stage presence, rose to fame in 2008 on American Idol. While he had already come out as gay to his friends and family years before, the world wasn’t fully aware of his sexuality during his Idol run. However, that changed dramatically just two months before the show’s finale, when photos of Lambert kissing another man leaked online.

Though Lambert was “very comfortable and secure” with who he was, the public’s reaction was a jarring wake-up call. In a recent interview with People magazine, the If I Had You hitmaker recalled the overwhelming backlash: “It was like I was going backwards in some ways.” For the first time, he felt “ashamed” of his identity—a feeling that starkly contrasted with the confidence he had in his personal life.

Lambert emphasized that during the American Idol live broadcasts, his sexuality wasn’t a topic of conversation. “There was no one asking me what my sexual preference was,” he explained. The show’s desire for a level playing field meant contestants weren’t allowed to give interviews during the competition. Despite this, the exposure of his personal life brought intense scrutiny, leaving Lambert to navigate the public eye in ways he hadn’t anticipated.

However, rather than let the negativity break him, Lambert ultimately emerged “stronger.” The backlash, though difficult, became a catalyst for the kind of art he wanted to create. His music, such as the empowering anthem Whataya Want from Me, became a reflection of his experiences—fueled by vulnerability and resilience.

Beyond his journey on Idol, Lambert also faced further challenges after his performance at the 2009 American Music Awards. While performing his hit For Your Entertainment, he kissed his male bassist on stage, sparking outrage and leading to over 1,500 telephoned complaints to ABC. As a result, Lambert’s appearances on Jimmy Kimmel Live! and Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve were canceled by the network. Reflecting on this moment, Lambert highlighted the frustrating double standards in the industry. “I remember doing an interview shortly after the show and them blurring my mouth as they replayed the clip,” he said. In contrast, high-profile same-sex kisses between Madonna and Britney Spears at the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards were aired without censoring, drawing attention to the selective nature of public outrage.

In the years since, the music landscape has evolved. Lambert, now in a relationship with Oliver Gliese, takes pride in seeing artists like Lil Nas X and Sam Smith embrace their identities unapologetically. For Lambert, their success is a sign of progress. “No matter what size or gender or sexuality you are, there is space for you,” he remarked. In his eyes, sparking conversation—positive or negative—is a sign of impact: “If you’re getting people talking, you’re winning on some level.”

Adam Lambert’s journey, from his days on American Idol to his continued success today, is a testament to the power of resilience, authenticity, and artistry. Through his struggles, he not only became stronger but also helped pave the way for future generations of LGBTQ+ artists, proving that there is always room for self-expression in the music industry.